Despite all the wonderful and inspiring videos about accepting daughter-in-law as a daughter, the number of cases of divorce mostly reasoned to disputes with in-laws continues to rise in India. Okay, admitted, if compared to other countries, India is low on divorce rates, but it is higher on separation and bad marriage rates.
Whether we pick up cases of suicides that are reported everywhere in country due to heart-breaks or bad marriages, or unreported marital violence in the country. Additionally, in a country with major rural areas, most people do not understand marital rape till date.
What could be a possible reason… well, in private interviews
and on the condition of confidentiality, some said, “If I truly love a girl,
how I can bring her into a scenario that not only changes her status from my
girlfriend to wife, but also binds her in rules that steal away her identity
and smile forever?”
In cases where many
chose to let their parents find their daughter-in-law, it started off
beautifully but resulting again in a sour marriages. All the sour marriages and
cheating partners made me wonder if there was actually a possibility where
people fell in love and stayed in it.
Look around, India suffers from bad marriages, harassment,
depression and what not much more than many western countries with high divorce
rates. Despite the rising women empowerment movement, the taboo of being
divorced hurdles life for many.
“Oh my! How can a single unmarried guy even consider
marrying a divorced girl?”
We do not even hear the expression enough, because not even
our current or future generation has the capacity to understand that marital
status and past can be just like an experience. Many cheat on their spouse,
have several partners (with live-ins and martial relations) before getting
married, but that does not count, because the big fat Indian wedding show was
avoided… right?
Anyways, not to went frustrations… Just on a quest to look
for a couple, who found love and sustained it through the horror of marriage…
I wondered, if I will ever find such a couple… I spoke to
seniors, who were caring and devoted just not infatuated with the idea of love.
I met young couples struggling to accept the twists and turns in their life
because of marriage and connected relatives (in-laws + a hundred others).
I tried my luck with love, arranged, love cum arranged, Baha’I,
Sahaj… god what not kind of marriages. Everyone settled with adjustments to
find their own happiness in some possible way… just none with excitement of
love and contentment in a relationship.
Then, I took a break and found a middle-aged couple with
adult children quarreling about… quarreling for each-other’s presence more in
their life. Despite spending the entire together, cooking and cleaning, going
out, still seeking more of each other… I will not disclose their name… but all
they told me is…
“I fell for her at first sight and she became my home…”
“I lost it all and found him, who gave me life and became my
knight…”
There was more… but it was enough to give me hope that
despite all the bad marriages, divorces and sour couples… some who find love
can sustain it through even if it involves a dozen fights… starting it right.